Ok, now we get deep for a moment… Is this the End, Beginning, or Somewhere in-between? What’s after this? I try to keep an open mind. I wouldn’t want to eliminate any options I might otherwise have had, if at some point something is actually proven as being valid. But then again there are plenty of people who do claim to have proof, or those who have claimed to have experienced what comes after personally and claim to know, for a fact, that it’s the real deal. Is it just our minds telling us it’s the truth when it really isn’t? We can’t know. The mind can play tricks on us in a myriad of ways. Some people can tap normally unused portions of their brain that most others can’t. Are they “gifted”? “Evolved?” “Enlightened?” Or just plain “crazy?” If they aren’t in the collective majority we call “normal”, are they “abnormal?”

I don’t want to be labeled an “atheist”, but I also don’t consider myself a member of any specific religion. There’s a general “Christian” label that people use for many, and think that generally means a good, god-fearing person with proper morals, etc., etc. I guess I wouldn’t be in that group either, as I’m not sure whether I believe in one or more all-powerful beings who control or create the universe, or not. There are just too many different religions and too many different views on everything to be certain any of them holds any merit. I go to church, yes, on occasion, in an effort to try to gain more knowledge about the Lutheran faith in particular. My wife has been Lutheran all of her life, so I accepted it and attend church with her when I can. Before that I was Methodist along with my parents and siblings when I was younger.

Most religions seem to have evolved over time to be a way of coping with the reality of death and the myriad of other problems revolving around life in general. Most people would rather have a definitive answer to the question “What happens to me when I die?” besides “Nothing. When you die you cease to exist any more. Biology continues to move on as usual, things decompose and break down, and you’re returned to nature, so-to-speak. But people seem to have a hard time dealing with the possibility that maybe there’s nothing after life, maybe this is all there is. We are miraculously created through biology, given the incredible gift of self-awareness, and then told we have a limited amount of time to exist. What do we do? So groups of us develop a whole backstory of history, some of it based on real events, some of it dramatized for effect, and we make it “official” and “real” by creating an ancient “document” said to be sacred and true, and label it “The Bible” or “The Koran”, or whatever you like, but it has to be something that enough of us will accept as the absolute truth.

It’s as old and convoluted as politics is today. And just as messed up. Today we get mass terrorism claiming to be in honor of Allah. Suicide bombers sacrificing themselves for their God, thinking it’s what they’re supposed to do–what they have to do. Most of us are taught “God is Good”. Where’s the good in taking the lives of other innocent people? People with different beliefs that yours. Who is right? Who is wrong? Who decides who is right and who is wrong? What are the beliefs of the one (or more) who decide who’s right and who’s wrong?

Who sets the ground rules for any of this? Wherever you are born, you’re restricted to the laws of that land – exposed to the religions and beliefs of your family and your environment, everyone on their own path, whether intended to better themselves, better mankind, or to destroy it and return it to ash. Most can only hope that the majority intends to make things better, bringing more and more people into the world and handing down their beliefs to them, giving them the gift of life with the hope that we can evolve, advance our collective knowledge, and use that to keep our species alive and thriving. Life is ultimately just a classic good-versus-evil scenario. Either way, our time here is limited. It’s a gift. And a short one at that. What we choose to do with it is our choice.

Personally, I am what they call morbidly obese (over 100 lbs above what is considered my normal body weight). This will significantly lower my life expectancy. Along with this comes the extra wear and tear on my body and organs, my knees are breaking down causing me a lot of pain. I’ve had a total knee replacement and a partial meniscectomy done on my other knee so far, and I have Type 2 Diabetes, though I am taking insulin injections daily, almost as a Type 1 Diabetic would. I have a goal of losing weight and getting in much better shape, but with also having a job, a family, an addiction to food and a love for all things movies and video games, it is very slow going. My love of food is slowly killing me, but I’m happy. This is my choice. I am still very in love with my wife, enjoying every day as much as possible doing the things I like to do, and even enjoying my work. I try to do my part to help in my work. I help many others on a daily basis in a hospital environment. Though it isn’t the patients of the hospital, I help the staff, who, in turn, help the patients. Keep a staff member happy and hopefully that kindness is paid forward to the patient.

I may not live to the ripe old age of 90, being in the shape I’m in right now, but I’ve had, and am having, a great time getting this far and I can’t complain one bit. This gift of life I’ve been given has taught me a great deal and allowed me to experience many many things I will cherish until the time comes that I cease to exist. I only hope I am around long enough to be able to share as much of what I’ve learned and experienced in some way or ways. Writing and photography seem to be the simplest method for this, so I write here, and in a personal journal I keep to myself. I take photographs regularly, which automatically get stored in “the cloud”. Storage space for all of this information is unlimited these days (as long as someone keeps making the payments) so I will take advantage of that as much as I can and continue to write and snap as much as I can.

So in response to my initial question I say “I have no idea, so why dwell on it longer than the time it takes to read this article? Go live it. Be happy. Enjoy. It may be all you get.”